Sunday, April 8, 2018

Explanations are Impossible

Answering innocent questions can be difficult.

Q: What were you doing in the tropics for so many years? 

Me: Uh. I was in a cult, following the teachings of a madman.
No, that won't do. 
I did volunteer work. 

Q: Cool! Volunteer work! What exactly did you do? Did you work in the slums?

Me: I was a childcare worker, maid, and FFer. For some reason, I don't think they'd understand that.
I mainly taught the kids of other volunteers.

Q: So you were a teacher in Japan, right? Where did you teach?

Me: At enormous Combo Homes caring for large groups of children 24/7 and working myself to exhaustion and nervous breakdown, all while struggling against sin and self in my striving to learn "submission." 
At a private international school.

Q: What was it called? Would I know it? What train line was it on?

Me: Should I say The Heavenly City School? No, that's going to sound nuts. I have no idea what train line anything was on. I never went out. 
It doesn't exist anymore.

Q: Have you been to [insert any sightseeing or famous destination in any of the countries where I lived]?

Me: No, I was busy at home.


That life was inexplicable. Please don't ask me any more questions.

1 comment:

  1. Funny...and terribly pathetic!