Q&A 5: Sex with Married Men

Were you 'with' a married man? And did you consider that, even, under the circumstances, a form of ministry?

Yes, I was with many married men. The cult euphemism for promiscuous sex was "sharing," and it was a basic tenet of the group from about 1977 on. If women (and even girls until the late 1980's) didn't submit to the sexual advances of the men in the group, they were considered "selfish" and sinful. It was our duty as women to "take care of the needs of the men."

I wrote about that here.

It was a very skewed mentality, obviously. Our "normal" became anything but normal. But it was our normal. We were the "elect" and we lived to a higher moral standard than the rest of humanity, so we alone could be "trusted" with "God's Law of Love."

And, of course, Flirty Fishing (FFing) was the ultimate form of "sacrifice to show God's love to the lost." One would not consider refusing to FF and hope to remain in the group.

So, yep. That's how it went.

I was largely protected from the rampant promiscuity because of my life in a small WS Home with just another couple, then later serving under leaders I was also somewhat set aside. I was glad for that.